hatesdeerstalkers | WCB R5 item list

Trading/Giving Away
Bearies Creme-Filled Cakes: A box of yellow creme-filled cakes. The cakes themselves are moist and beary delicious.
Cinnamon Bun: Mmm! Sweet and delicious and tastes exactly like the first time you ever had a cinnamon bun.
Heart Doll: It's a cute doll of your favorite Roidmude! It has the ability to Transformer-esque shift into a different form, and also comes with a red beanie, just in case it gets chilly.
Golden Slippers: The slippers as pure as gold. They're small, but someone here may be able to fit in them.
Magic 8-Ball: Tell your fortune, as vaguely as possible.
Pumpkin Pete's Marshmallow Crunch: Tastes like victory! And sugar, lots of sugar.
Civet Coffee: Made from an extremely rare and expensive coffee bean collected from the dung of the Asian palm civet. It has a unique fragrance...
Sing-A-Ma-Jig: Your fuzzy singing pal!
Plastic Light Sword: A shitty knockoff lightsaber toy. They didn't even bother making the flashlight part look like anything but a regular flashlight.
Distinguished Dress: A beautiful, beautiful… article of clothing.
Everlasting Gobstobber: A single piece of hard candy. No matter how long you suck on it, it never grows smaller.
Mean Beans: High quality coffee beans from a small cafe called the Electric Brewgaloo.
Princess Dress: A maroon and black dress in a gothic lolita style. Upon closer examination, it’s clearly a cheap costume for children, with a small logo on the back for something called “Princess Land.”
Bootleg Bear Plush: A plush of some strange bear that’s black on its right side and white on its left, with one poorly-stitched red eye. Who is he? Why is he here? He has a terrible aura...
Chocolate Frosted Sugar Bombs: With marshmallow bits! Part of this complete breakfast?
Parkour 101: A handbook on how to do all kinds of sick jumps and flips and things that cool kids did in whatever year it was when parkour was hilariously big.
Stay-Puft Marshmallow Man Plush: Aww, it’s so much cuter when it’s not 50 feet tall destroying New York. A gift from Ray.
76 Trombones: Seventy-six trombones fall out of the merchandise booth. Fucking rip.

Throwing Out

Apple Juice: A single serving bottle. It's weirdly warm?
Unfun Dip: This colorful packet contains a delicious Lick-A-Stick and a bunch of strange black powder, which the packaging claims is one of 76 fun flavors! Can you solve the mystery?
Crustables: A sealed plastic bag filled with bread crust, with remnants of peanut butter on jelly on some of them.

Keeping

An Actual Live Chicken: HOLY SHIT WHY WAS THIS HERE IT'S GETTING FEATHERS EVERYWHERE wHAT THE FUCK
Hot Chocolate: A packet of powdered chocolate. Mix it with hot milk or water for a warm, delicious treat.
Modest Clothes A pair of full-length black pants and a loose-fitting white turtleneck. It looks like something from an incredibly repressed futuristic society.
Bottled Water: A bottle of clear mountain spring water.
Life-Sized Stuffed Penguin: A stuffed penguin about a foot and a half tall. Looks almost real, but is almost unbelievably soft.
Sunglasses: Black aviators, to be specific.
Swiss Army Knife: The kind that has like a million attachments you'll never use.
SEXY Pajamas: A light, comfortable set of pants and a button-up top, covered in glittery red hearts.
Eye-Patch: Plain and black, but functional. Yar har fiddle-dee-dee.
“Almond Flavoring”: A tightly-sealed vial of some kind of powder with a skull and crossbones on it and a very direct warning label informing the reader that it’s Literally Just Cyanide.
Sunflower Seeds: The seeds of that particular flower that loves facing the sun. They have a flavor somewhat similar to peanuts.
Absolute Tuning Fork: A huge tuning fork that hides the power to destroy the entire world with resonance, if used by someone who has mastered the art of tuning. It’s also good for drying out laundry.
Utility Belt: A belt perfect for hanging various tools and implements on. It's even got a roll of duct tape already attached!
Charleston Chew: Share it with your dad! Share it with your son! Share with your dad/granddad who is also your son/adoptive brother!
Playing Cards: A deck of completely normal 52 playing cards. Absolutely nothing weird about them.
Angel Mug: A simple, white ceramic mug with a pair of wings instead of a standard handle.
Cake: It… says “Congrats on the Sex” on it. It’s ecto cooler flavored!! A gift from Ray.
Confetti: Gold, textured confetti, perfect to fall over the audience during the finale!
A Pirate's Life For Me: Not an actual life, just the outfit. But you could MAKE it a life if you wanted, because a pirate is free. Eye-Patch not included.
Box of Chocolates: A metaphor for life, perhaps. There's a lot of coconut mixed in with these.